Shadow-Stepping

One week before I arrived in Dongducheon, my Korean teacher wanted to describe for me how Eastern cultures hold teachers in high regard, ". . . not like here, in states," she said with a minor level of disgust. She told me not to be surprised if my students did not even address me as Ms. Saenz. Rather, it is customary for them to address me as, "Teacher Saenz" or better, in Korean it would be, "Son-Sehng Saenz" (try saying that over and over). It reminded me of the weight that comes with the Hebrew word for teacher, rabbi--there's a wisdom, a heavy responsibility, and a deep knowledge attached to that name. Suddenly, I felt intimidated. It's not that I haven't taken my responsibility as a teacher seriously, but I've always had to fight against that common phrase that gets thrown around with a stupid smirk and a chuckle, "Those who can't, teach . . ." I mean, let's face it, when people have asked me what I do for a living, a slight apologetic tone slips out as if to say, "I'm only a teacher but I also hope to one day do x, y, and z." However, because of what I've seen in my students (their precious value), I feel that the tables are turned. Rather than having to prove that teaching is a valuable calling, I should have to prove that I am valuable enough to fulfill such a calling. The day I feel "good enough" to be a teacher (by any standards other than God's), I should probably quit. But I digress . . .

Back to my Korean teacher, lets call her Son-Sehng Hyun. She continued to convey the connotation of calling someone a Son-Sehng. "Even more respectful than how you call father or mother," she exclaimed this with a long drawn out "yeeeeees" at the end of her sentence as if to answer the look of disbelief on my face. Furthermore, (and here's the poetic part) she related an old custom which is no longer practiced: When a student walks with her teacher, the teacher leads the way, the student must follow (makes sense) but here's the kicker--as student follows teacher, the student must be very careful to not step on the teacher's shadow (makes plenty of poetic sense). As most of my students will tell you, I take symbolism to extreme levels. This is no exception, prohibited shadow-stepping really hit me. This brings a whole new meaning to "darting in and out of the shadows," right?

Someone's shadow is an extended "mark" of their being only when they are already walking in light. This shadow would not exist in dark places. Thus, stepping on a teacher's shadow, is an ugly disregard for the "light" that comes with their teaching. Resting in someone's shadow is a refuge, walking in it, is denying their capability to lead you in the way you should go-- the "lighted" path. Take John 1:4-5, "In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." This is my personal reminder that as a follower of Jesus, I must walk with Jesus in the truth and grace of His light.

As I am now only four days away from our first day of school at the Amerasian Christian Academy, I am fully reminded of my grave responsibility to continue to train up my students in the way they should go. With God's help, I am charged to metaphorically keep them out of my shadow--not as a form of power or oppression, but as a form of protection from darkness (even my own darkness).